10 Reasons why it's smart to have a dumb phone.

1. Talk in the rain.

Call everyone you know in the middle of a thunderstorm and be like "Hey, I'm in the middle of a thunderstorm." You can. 

2. Label it myPhone. 

When questioned convince people it's part of Apple's new subversive marketing strategy to convert non iPhone users. Tell them to look it up. 

3. Look stuff up. For free.

 Ever been in a situation where you're out with friends and haven't been able to check your balance or check-in on Facey? Of course you haven't. Because every single one of your friends don't have your phone. Start asking for their phone to tag them in annoying statuses like "I love not paying for my myPhone bill every month" or "Saving money always pays." 

4. Pick your own ringtone.

 Don't be told what you can and cannot be rung with. If someone did this with an iPhone generic tune it would just be weird. Not with a Nokia!

  

5. Emphasize what a glowing global citizen you are. 

 In a world where we replace cell phones faster than we can say shame environment I do what I want, your inability to afford ability to resist constant upgrading will only make you sparkle more amongst your smart-phoned friends.

6. No one can accuse you of your phone being smarter than you. 

 Not even Siri. Siri-who? Exactly. 

 

7. Battery life. 

 Charge a brick and it will go and go and go like Milo for days. And if you wish hard enough bricks revive wait what? Yes, simply chant "Come on come on come on you're a Nokia." That should do it.

 8. When it breaks, you're probably not going to care. 

 You won't cry when the screen cracks. When the back comes off you'll smile and look around for some more cellotape.You're not socially obliged to get your brick fixed within 3-5 shipping days so spend that time remembering the reaction no one gave when you dropped it. 

 

9. Snake.

Snake snake Severus Snape.  Oh, you don't have snake on your smartphone, you say? You're playing Angry birds? Ah kay. You'll be back. 

 

10. There's scope yet for a camera-phone.

 What if you're still contemplating the pro/cons of a camera residing in a phone? If it's already built in it's sort of hard to remove. Once you're sure and the glue is dry, have a party to celebrate.

 

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